Archive for November, 2012
A newborn boy was left on a pavement in Kuwana, Mie Prefecture, on Friday morning, police said.
According to police, the naked infant, with his umbilical cord still attached, was found on the pavement by a male motorist at about 7:30 a.m, TBS reported. The child was taken to hospital and is in a stable condition, doctors said.
Police are looking for the person or persons who abandoned the newborn.
Lawdiva’s Blog – Canadian Lawyer Georgialee Lang – Her recent story on Parental Alienation
There are many divorced fathers in Canada who believe they are nothing more than a “wallet” in their children’s eyes. It is rare however, for a judge to confirm that status in Reasons for Judgment, but that is exactly what Mr. Justice Gray did in his recent decision in Veneman v. Veneman 2012 ONSC 6324.
Mr. and Mrs. Veneman separated in 2004 after 11 years of marriage. Mr. Veneman left the family home but maintained the financial status quo and enjoyed a good relationship with the children, ages 8 and 11.
The apparent bliss of separation disappeared, however, when Mr. Veneman commenced a personal relationship with a woman he met on the internet. His ex-wife’s reaction was venomous as revealed in vulgar emails from her to Mr. Veneman where she called his girlfriend an “internet whore”.
At about the same time, Mr. Veneman decided that after two years of separation, the parties should reorganize their financial affairs. He closed the joint account that his wife and he shared since the date of separation and began paying voluntary child and spousal support.
Ms. Veneman’s campaign of abuse against Mr. Veneman was quickly adopted by his two girls who also began writing mean-spirited and disrespectful emails to their father. The children were particularly angered by their father when he brought his girlfriend to a birthday party for one of the girls hosted by the girl’s paternal grandparent. This was the first occasion they had met her, although Mr. Veneman told his children about her and their relationship.
As time went on, the girls also sent emails scolding their father for failing to provide sufficient funds to their mother. The Court found that Ms. Veneman liberally shared her views about his girlfriend and his financial contribution, all actions which eventually led to the termination of any father/daughter relationship.
Eldest daughter Maggie described her father in an email to him as “selfish, greedy, lying, back-stabbing, neglecting, blackmailing, bribing, idiotic, mean and just overall a stupid person”. This kind of poison most often originates from a parent who cannot see that their attitude is severely harming their children.
Despite the difficulties, Mr. Veneman continued to make every effort to reconnect and appease his children but all overtures were rebuffed by them.
With his older daughter approaching the age of nineteen and attending Queen’s University, Mr. Veneman brought an application to court asking for an order that his obligation to pay child support cease upon her birthday.
Several years earlier, he had agreed to an order that he pay 75% of his children’s post-secondary education costs, but he now argued that her termination of any relationship with him was cause for the court to reconsider his child support obligations.
Mr. Veneman relied on several cases where courts noted that an adult child’s unilateral and unreasoned abandonment of a parental relationship could lead to a termination of support. Other cases, however, were cited where the proposition was accepted that “estrangement, even at the sole instance of the child, should not be relevant”.
Judge Gray, however, did not need to grapple with which authority was correct as he was able to decide the case by finding that the father had not shown a material change in circumstances, which was the required test to vary a child support order. The judge held that when Mr. Veneman agreed to pay post-secondary expenses in 2009, he had no relationship with Maggie, and had no relationship now.
He declared that Mr. Veneman “was nothing more than a wallet” and said the blame for the alienation must be assumed by both parents.
It is here where I part company with the judge’s findings. It is startling to suggest that the clumsy, perhaps even insensitive, introduction of a new partner to one’s children who are 10 and 13, after two years of separation from their mother, constitutes conduct that is blameworthy.
In my view, Ms. Veneman’s immature behavior is the reason her children have ousted their father from their lives. I hope when the girls figure it out, which they will, they will clearly understand their mother’s role in a tragic family situation the judge called “irrational and avoidable”.
Interesting that if you are part of an intact family you can decide how much you want to contribute, if any, to your child’s education, but if you are separated or divorced the State decides.
Equally interesting is the absence of any reference to “parental alienation”. I guess if you don’t say it, it doesn’t exist.
Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( 1 so far )
Bryan McGlothin is working on a documentary about parental abduction. Bryan was abducted by his father when he was 2 years. His father moved around to prevent Bryan’s mother from finding him. Bryan was told (by his father) that his mother did not love him and did not want to be in his life. When Bryan became an adult and escaped his father’s grip he began searching for his mothers grave, since his father told him that his mother had died. Instead of finding his mother’s grave, he found his mother. But it was not the fairy tale story that everyone hopes for. You can read his book or listen to his interview on Family Matters Blog Talk Radio with Jill Egizii the president of Parental Alienation Awareness Organization. Bryan’s book, “Have You Seen My Mother: A True Story of Parental Kidnap.”, is a gut wrenching. Bryan’s documentary will raise awareness about a subject that has been off the radar for too long. Please think about donating to this cause. You can find more information at:
About the Documentary
It’s estimated about 250,000 children are abducted by a parent or family member every year in the United States alone. Parental abduction is also a major international problem.
As these children are used a pawns in toxic relationships, the abuse they endure is ignored. Abuse, many of us have to deal with for many years, well into adulthood…
We examine this abuse from the child’s point-of-view by interviewing adult survivors of this abuse.
We are also looking to film in Canada, Australia and the UK. Parental abduction to Japan is one of the largest issues in international parental abduction.
Where the Money Goes
As you can see, we need several thousand to cover travel expenses. With the $30,000.00 we also expect to be able to accomplish preliminary editing (post production), but we are working on grants to pay for the final editing. Anything we can raise over our goal will help us complete the documentary, pay for marketing, etc. and any extra money goes to the non-profit Prevent Parental Kidnap, Inc.
By GeorgiaLee Lang http://lawdiva.wordpress.com/2012/11/11/no-au-revoir-for-halle-berry/
Oscar-winning actress Halle Berry will not be allowed to move permanently to France with her four-year-old daughter Nahla Ariela Aubry, a ruling made on Friday by a California judge. Nahla’s father, Gabriel Aubry is a Canadian actor and model who lives and works in Los Angeles.
Ms. Berry has battled Nahla’s father since the couple separated in 2010, pulling out the usual grab-bag of custody tricks, including her refusal to pay child support to him, later rectified by a judge who ordered that she pay $20,000 to Mr. Aubry as a joint custodial parent. There was also a failed attempt to suggest that Mr. Aubry has been “physical” with Nahla’s nanny. After a complete investigation, accompanied by a period of supervised access for Mr. Aubry, the allegations were thrown out.
When a parent applies to the court to move permanently with a child to a jurisdiction far away from home and the child’s other parent, there are a number of considerations that come into play. Is the move in the child’s best interests? The factors include:
1. Will the child be able to maintain a relationship with the left-behind parent?
2. Will the quality of the relationship with the left-behind parent be sufficient to continue the parental bond?
3. How far will the child and left-behind parent have to travel to maintain their relationship?
4. How much will it cost for the left-behind parent to travel to visit the child and who will pay the expenses?
5. Will the change in the child’s permanent residence impact on the involvement of extended family in the child’s life, such as maternal and paternal grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins?
6. Will the move enhance the child and moving parent’s quality of life in regards to better opportunities for financial security?
7. Is the motive for the move an attempt to minimize parenting time to the other parent?
Ms. Berry’s rationale for the move is that she did not want her daughter growing up around paparazzi and the tabloids, arguing that she could provide more privacy, and a greater sense of security for her daughter in France, where coincidentally, her latest boyfriend lives.
Ms. Berry must have forgotten that Princess Diana’s death was attributed to overzealous paparazzi in Paris and that Kate Middleton’s recent nude photos were taken in France, by a local celebrity photographer. I’m sure Mr. Aubry’s lawyer remembered.Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )
CRIME NOV. 09, 2012 -TOCHIGI —
Police on Thursday arrested a 29-year-old woman for allegedly strangling to death her 2-year-old daughter at their home in Tochigi.
According to police, they received a call at 9 a.m. on Wednesday from a woman saying that she had strangled her daughter, NTV reported. Police rushed to the apartment and found the girl lying on the living room floor. She was taken to hospital where she was confirmed dead.
Police took the woman into custody. She was quoted as saying that she sat on her daughter’s back and strangled her with both hands, NTV reported.
According to police, the woman lived with her husband and daughter. She has been visiting a hospital regularly for treatment of mental health problems.
Japan TodayRead Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )
KUMAMOTO–Controversial when it started five years ago, the Jikei Hospital’s “Akachan Post” (Baby box) remains a source for critics, despite its successful track record for allowing unwanted babies to get new homes.
The hospital in Kumamoto Prefecture opened the Akachan Post on May 10, 2007, in which parents can anonymously place their babies they cannot raise by themselves.
A total of 81 babies were placed into the box, named “Konotori no Yurikago” (Stork’s cradle), by September 2011.
Of these, 37 are currently living with new families as adopted children or under the care of foster patents, while 27 others have been placed in child-care facilities. The remaining 17 are being raised by their real parents or others, according to the Kumamoto city government.
The service remains a source of debate. Critics say that it deprives children of the chance to know who their real parents are. They also wonder if it is an appropriate route for unwanted babies to be sent through, and for society as a whole to allow it.
However, the hospital said it will continue to allow parents to put their babies in the box anonymously.
“The right to know who their real parents are is important,” said Yukiko Tajiri, head of the nurses’ section of the hospital.
“But there are babies who may have been abandoned and died unless their parents can put them in the box anonymously. “Anonymity is necessary to save the babies. Though it looks like the parents easily put their babies in the box, they are also tormented by having to do so.”
In one success story, in the house of a married couple in their late 30s, a 2-year-old boy is actively walking around. His favorite television show is a children’s program in which the good guys fight and defeat the bad guys. Imitating the good guys, he holds a stick and wields it like a sword. The couple is watching him happily.
The boy was put in the Akachan Post soon after he was born. When he was around 11 months old, the couple adopted him.
The mother had experienced recurrent miscarriages. Wanting a child desperately, they knew that an adoption agency was looking for a couple to adopt the boy. They applied to the organization for his adoption.
When the couple met the baby for the first time at a home for infants, they were told that he had been placed in the Akachan Post. At that time, they also knew that his real parents were facing circumstances in which they could not raise him themselves.
Though the couple was surprised to hear that, they decided to adopt him after visiting him for a month, thinking that the baby was not responsible for such circumstances.
In their house, the couple slept with him for the first time and responded to the baby’s repeated cries at night. They also took the boy on trips. Through those experiences, the Akachan Post baby became a loving son for them.
Imagining the difficulties of his real mother who had placed the baby in the Akachan Post immediately after he was born, the couple still feels pity.
“Thank you for sparing the life of this child,” the wife said she wants to tell her. “We will accept the job of offering to this boy the affection you should have offered.”
The couple is now praying that his real mother will recover and become happy.
The couple thinks that in the future, they should tell their son that they are not his real parents, although they feel anxious about doing so. However, they are going to tell him that the Akachan Post was set up to save the lives of babies, and that his real mother put him in the box to save his life.
The couple says that the Akachan Post is necessary in today’s society and hopes that it can be an accepted alternative for unwanted children.
Since the Akachan Post was set up five years ago, however, there has been criticism that putting babies in the box anonymously is depriving the babies of their right to know who their real parents are.
The parents of 67 of the 81 babies have been found. Those of the remaining 14 babies have yet to be located.
A former staff member of a child counseling center, who had been working for the protection of babies put in the box for several years, searched for their parents to make it possible for them to know who their real parents are.
“I wanted to look for them by any means,” the former staff member said.
According to reports revealed in a meeting of a Kumamoto city government’s committee specializing in the issue, some of the real parents put their babies in the box for selfish reasons, such as jobs or going abroad to study.
“Some parents come to the box because they can abandon their babies anonymously. We can say that the babies were separated from their parents because there is the Akachan Post,” the former staff member said. “We also have to pay attention to the fact that about 10 percent of the babies placed in the box are children with disabilities.”
Jikei Hospital is asking parents to consult its staff before putting their babies in the box. It is making the request to avoid a situation in which the parents of the babies are not known. The hospital is also putting in the unmanned box a letter asking parents to give their names to its staff.Read Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )
CRIME NOV. 03, 2012 -IBARAKI —
Police said Friday that a newborn baby girl, with its umbilical cord still attached, was found dead in an apartment parking lot in Hitachi, Ibaraki Prefecture.
According to police, a man who was walking by the parking lot, noticed bloodstains on the ground, TBS reported. After following the trail of the bloodstains, he found the infant’s body face down beside a shed in the corner of the parking lot.
Police said the child was naked and there were no external signs of injury on the body.
Japan TodayRead Full Post | Make a Comment ( None so far )